To Be Gluten Free or Not to Be?

Well, I feel like we just aren't seeing results whether we eat gluten-free or not. We had strayed from our diet for a few weeks because we were passing the flu and other illnesses around in our house. I decided last week we had to get back on course and we have. I think if anything is helping, I think the supplements do help. Cutting out corn syrup, monsodium glutimate, and food dyes is always a good thing. But the gluten free is so hard to do and I just don't know that I see a difference whether he eats a sandwhich on whole wheat or gluten free bread.....honestly, it's expensive and I'm tired of hearing complaints from Joel and Alex about the taste and texture of the bread items after all the work I have to put into making it all home-made.

So, I am kind of giving up on it. I'm still cutting back on as many glutens as I can, but a slice of whole wheat toast in the morning or as a sandwhich for lunch.......that's all the bread he eats anyway. I will continue with the gluten-free pastas. We like those. The corn based pastas seem to keep their consistency the best and we don't seem to have a problem getting past the yellow noodles. :o) I bought Arnold's whole wheat bread this week (it's corn syrup free, which is very difficult to find) and a box of Special K red berries, which has wheat products in it. So, I have decided to continue to attempt to make wise choices, but relax a little and make my life a tad easier.

We had a major blow out here Sunday night. Alex in OCD overdrive, Joel correcting him until he couldn't take it anymore, and then both of them yelling. I just sit and close my eyes and pray that God will somehow deliver me from this, while Katie is already sleeping and somehow manages to continue through all the chaos and noise. Our home is not a household of peace and my spirit longs for it. Finally, Joel walked away, but Alex was angry and continued to rant and rave in his room at the top of his lungs. He was yelling that Joel was mean and a jerk and didn't understand. I went to his room and attempted to gently correct him and quiet him down, but he kept ranting at me, so I quietly shut the door to his room and walked away. As the noise continued, I got up again and shut the door to our room......he got the hint. After a few minutes, he came to our room and was still quite upset and repeating his same rantings. We told him we weren't going to listen if he didn't calm down. He calmed and quieted and shared some of his feelings and struggles with us. Joel began to interrupt, which I knew would set Alex off again. Sometimes, he just needs to get it out and tell us how he feels and what is causing the anxiety and we do have a tendency to interrupt to add our input and that makes things worse. He just needs to have his say. So, I told Joel that he needed to let Alex finish telling us how he felt and he agreed and backed down. Alex finished, we talked about a few things with him and then we prayed together. We hadn't prayed with him in months (to my recollection) and my heart broke when I realized how we have been trying everything else to fix this, when we have the greatest healer right here. God can ease our anxieties and quiet those voices better than any drug on the market or diet. Yet, I am embarrassed to say, we have put God on a shelf and gotten so wrapped up in trying to find other solutions that we have disregarded the one tried and true 100% effective remedy......our faith.

We are making a new habit of praying together as a family (Katie included). In the morning and at night. Praying for peace, praying for relief from anxiety. We have had 3 very quiet, peaceful days so far. Thank you, Jesus!
I am also attempting to add a bit of scripture memorization into our day. He can't battle the demons in his head (OCD) if he doesn't have the proper battle equipment. I told him the other morning that I see OCD as the devil....putting little thoughts in his head, "Alex, you touched that doorknob and who knows what germs might be on it......you'd better wash your hands." and he has to be strong enough to fight those thoughts. God is always with you, unless you walk away.....He won't turn his back on you. I told him to close his eyes when he thinks that way or feels anxiety and to quietly ask God to help him be strong. You might disagree with my way of thinking, but I don't know how else to make him stand up for himself and fight this. Unless Alex says, "no", to the OCD it will continue to run his life and I just can't imagine the constant fear and anxiety that he feels. It is no way to live.......he needs to be free.
Even our therapy is proving inaffective, unless Alex does his share......push the OCD back when it tries to push him around. Even though our counselor does not share things from a Christian perspective, she has basically said the same thing.....HE has to be strong and fight it or he'll never be able to cope.